I am making my way through what I know to be train cars despite the fact that it looks like I’m making my way through an apartment complex. The hallway is enormous, more like that of a fancy grand hotel where it seems there is more space than one could know what to do with it but without the fanciness and without the space because there are so many people here. And, anyway, it does not feel like a fancy grand hotel but an apartment complex with far more residents than it can comfortably hold. And it is not an apartment complex but a series of connected train cars which makes me wonder how large this train is and how many people are riding on it. But I do not wonder for long because I am trying to make my way through this large crowd of mostly unpleasant people. Probably I would not find them so unpleasant if I stopped to get to know some of them, but I am looking for some space to breathe and relax so any crowd of people will seem unpleasant to me at the moment. I am relieved to see a room with some space for sitting. It turns out that my friend, I., is also here. I collapse onto the carpeted floor next to him and we exchange brief greetings. But I am soon distracted because I have noticed that in the very corner of the room sitting upon a dingy mattress with two other people is none other than Sting. He looks lethargic slouching with his back against the wall in Capris and a white tank top which he appears to have been wearing continuously for weeks.

Another friend, C., enters the room. She is her usual bubbly self, and she wastes no time announcing, “Hey everybody! You all know my cousin, Sting Ray, right?” Like a worn-out windup toy suddenly called to action, Sting begins very earnestly, but feebly, to hum and sing. A young woman sitting right in front of him exclaims, “Awkward!” This annoys me almost more than listening to Sting.

Suddenly, Sting is accompanying his vocal styling with some strums from an acoustic guitar hitherto unseen. I. and I look at one another and simultaneously comment through amusingly annoyed smirks: “Worst train ride ever.” Now I am also annoyed at myself and I.